On my way to work this morning, I was scrolling through my phone when I saw the display picture my friend put up. It was a program tagged ‘Singles Bonanza; I must Marry’. A lot of people might find that amusing but I simply find it repulsive. It’s amazing how men like to take advantage of one another. I guess that’s the success secret behind many businesses; Identify man’s desperate need and exploit it. It has been known to work time and time again.
As my Pastor will say; you cannot stop birds from flying but you can stop them from perching on your head. In the same vein, I may not have control over the devil’s schemes and tricks but I can stop him from having a field day messing around with my life. So, I thought it will be a good time to discover how we can live satisfied lives whether as single or married ladies. Life is to be enjoyed and not endured.
As I have come to learn; Life is a journey and not a destination. It is our responsibility to enjoy every passing moment of that journey. There was a period in my life that I felt like nothing significant or exciting was happening and I was gradually falling into depression. I decided to open up to my Pastor who had come to be my close confidant. She identified with what I was going through, encouraged and prayed with me but most importantly, she advised that I read a book ‘Enjoying where you are on your way to where you are going by Joyce Meyer’.
The truth is I started that book but never got to the end (covering my face). So, I decided to pick it again, dust it up and read through. I learnt a lot from it and thought you might as well.
I have come to discover that a lot of people (especially women) get to a stage in life, where nothing significant seems to be happening and they are overwhelmed by all happening around them. Some married women don’t see their dreams becoming a reality anymore as the life they now live is for their immediate family and somehow feel cheated of fulfilment (please don’t get me wrong, every woman knows the joy of having a family but learning to balance the different aspect of that life brings wholeness). Some ladies feel worn out by the job they do, they are just tired of having their job control their existence. Perhaps you are at a point where you’ve lost the excitement and life just seems to drag on and on, while you struggle to get by yet another day; the ability to put that joy back in life lies in your hands. Make a quality decision today to enjoy where you are. Perhaps, a few tips might be helpful;
Find what makes you happy (that one thing that makes your heart beat and makes you look forward to the next day) and stick with it. It could be writing, baking, crafts, cooking etc. Whatever it is, don’t lose sight of it. Fight to keep your joy.
Have a friend you can talk to; especially one who is firm enough to correct you and warm enough to embrace you. Learn to open up; it is the road to healing. No one knows what you are going through until you say it.
Never isolate yourself. God created us to share our lives as men (in the generic sense). Be a blessing to someone. Have wholesome relationship that will bring fulfilment.
Understand that each day is a gift, once gone can never be retrieved. Be grateful for each new day and enjoy it, choose to be a blessing even in simple ways.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Remember “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more” Isaiah 43:25. If God can forgive and remember no more, how much more you. Do yourself a favour and forgive yourself for those past mistakes. Brooding over it will not undo the mistakes; it will only prevent you from enjoying yourself now.
Forgive easily, love genuinely and enjoy one day at a time.
Learn a craft, take a vacation or give yourself a treat once in awhile.
Celebrate yourself; you are one of a kind. ”He has inscribed you on the palms of His hands; your walls are continually before Him”. You are indeed special.
We might not be where we are going yet but we are not where we used to be and we are making progress. There’s so much to look forward to. There’s no ultimate destination where joy dwells. We must decide to dig out the wells of joy on the inside of each one of us at every point of this journey called life.
Satisfaction doesn’t come from you having all you want at the moment; rather it comes from being grateful for and enjoying all that you have now.
And Yes! You can live a satisfying life. Make that quality decision today.
Journal of a Single Lady……..